Friday, June 8, 2018

Why You Need to Know the Value of the 35-Year-Old Woman


Why you need to know the value of the 35-year-old woman? She is resilient, determined, and clear about her needs, wants, and priorities.

For more than 30 years, my work and service targets the delivery of personal and professional development services to the 35-year-old woman. Because the target is always moving with only the faces changing, the issues remain the same. Among the findings are:

1.      7 in 10 women age 35 have experienced sexual violence in the form of incest rape as children and teens at the hands of family, family friends, or professional adults.
2.      2+ marriages and divorces
3.      2+ children
4.      2 – 4 years post - secondary education
5.      Sole provider for the support of family and children
6.      Suffers from PTSD
7.      10 – 20 pounds overweight

My observation and engagement of this 35-year-old woman establishes that she has an awakening moment that speaks to her and prompts her to action to reorient her present and future life.  After asking herself if the earlier experiences of sexual violence have affected her personal and professional development, she arrives at a resounding YES.

Upon her awakening, she seeks counseling to deal with the experience of sexual violence earlier in her life. A fuller engagement of herself as a person follows along with fuller engagement of her children. Positive human relations techniques become the approach to personal, child, and professional development.

She becomes her priority becoming aware she cannot really provide best-case care to others until she makes sure she provides that to herself. Subsequent to counseling to deal with the after effects of hostile treatment earlier in life, a much more assertive person emerges positioned to manage personal and professional relationships more effectively. Take her serious or do not take her at all.

The other side of this perspective of the 35-year-old woman is the market drive, political and cultural demographics that make her the pawn swing voter to win elections.  Journalists Emilie McMeekan and Annabel Rivkin describe this new tribe of women aged 35-55 in their work, The Rise of the Midult, as midults.

The Midult is being described as more than just a demographic but a movement and a mindset. And the 35-55 year old woman is one of the most powerful consumer groups. In the UK, 8 million women fall into this category and, according to The Midult team, women drive an estimated 70-80% of consumer spending globally. However, many midult women feel they get overlooked and misunderstood by brands and media outlets.
According to Emilie McMeekan , co-founder of The Midult, “Midults are a unique combination of digitally literate, hyper-connected and financially confident, they are the first generation to grow old without checking out. We are the healthiest, wealthiest and most active generation of women in history. Ignore us at your peril.”
Both these 35-year-old women co – exist and simultaneously exist. One gets the life sucked out of her because she is successful with money to spend and a vote to cast. The other has struggled to manage emotional survival. She is discounted, disregarded, and not invited to make media soundbytes for politicians and popular movements. She should be the poster image of the Metoo Movement.
How can we embrace women that have suffered and experienced intolerable harm in such ways to facilitate their healing sooner more effectively? When we answer that question, our culture will have moved inches towards justice for women and emotional wholeness of culture. A culture that turns its back on its girls and women can come to no good end.
You need to know the value of the 35-year-old woman. She is resilient, determined, and clear about her priorities, about her needs, and her wants.
Join the conversation. Your questions and comments may bring forward an enlightening moment. You are welcome. By loving each other enough to help each other recover and heal, we build a better individual woman or man, girl or boy, one relationship at a time.

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